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 Topic: JokEs na makukulit. Haha..  (Read 58736 times)
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05-14-11 08:14 PM
kukuruku
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Erap Bumps foreigner

Erap: sorry!!!
Foreigner: sorry too!!
Erap: im sorry 3!!!
Foreigner: What your sorry for??
Erap: sorry 5!!!
Foreigner: sorry but your sick!!
Erap: Sorry 7.. kala yata nito hindi ako marunong magbilang ah.

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Reporter: Manny, anong bill gagawin mo ngayong congressman ka na?

Pacquiao: Anong "bill"? Yun bang tumutunog pagkatapos ng bawat round?
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Dying Chinese: "Ako lapit na patay. Ikaw sabi totoo kung sino ama ng bunso natin kasi pangit siya  kumpala sa 9 kapatid niya."
Wife: "Siya lang tunay mo anak!"

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Pasyente: Okey ba ang services sa ospital na ito?
Doktor: Oo naman. Sigurado iyon.
Pasyente: Paano kung hindi ako satisfied?
Doktor: Ibabalik namin ang sakit mo.
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gwapo nagtext: labs, paload naman P100.
bakla: ok! (ngmamadlaing mghanap ng loading area)
bakla: nareceive mo na labs?
gwapo: HU U?

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6 senses of kissing.

Sense of Smack.
Sense of Torrid.
Sense of Gigil.
Sense of Hawak.
Sense of Libog.

Eh ano yong pang anim? Absense! Wala ng CLOTHES.. haha.

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Apat na uri ng pala-utot:

1. MAPAGKUNWARI - Uutot ng tahimik at pagkatapos ay aastang inosente, mambibintang pa!
2. MAHIYAIN - Uutot ng mahina tapos ngingiti.
3. MAYABANG - Uutot ng malakas, tapos parang balewala sa kanya na narinig ng lahat ang utot niya!
4. MALAS - Susubukang umutot pero TAE ang lumabas.
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6 senses of 2012.

Sense of earth.
Sense of fire.
Sense of tsunami.
Sense of Hurricane.
Sense of storm.

Eh ano yong pang anim? Absense! Wala ng EARTH. Hehe.
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Anak: Mom I know the truth!
Mom: Ha?! Heto P500 huwag ka lang maingay sa Dad mo!

Anak: Dad I know the truth!

Dad: Ha?! Heto ang P1000 huwag ka lang maingay sa Mom mo!

Anak: (ok pala ito... subukan ko nga sa katulong) Inday I know the truth!

Inday: SA WAKAS!!! YAKAPIN MO AKO ANAK!!!

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A girl shouted inside the church & said:

"itigil ang kasal!
may asawa na ang lalaking yan!"

The people shouted back:

"sige lakasan mo pa, binyag ito TANGA!
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Naglalakad ang mag-ama, nakakita ng eroplano

ANAK: Tay! Krus! Ang laking krus!

TATAY: (Binatukan ang anak) Nakita mo ng krus eh! Lumuhod tayo!

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Pedro: Ang galing ng tatay ko kapag kinuha ang sintoron niya sa pantalon nagiging panyo.

Juan: Mas magaling tatay ko kapag hinugot ang sintoron sa pantalon niya nawawala ako.
Reply #1
05-25-11 12:22 AM
kukuruku
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ma'am? Tama ba? Hehe..
Reply #2
05-25-11 06:42 PM
john_paul
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post pa po kayo ng iba ang gaganda po ng mga jokes nyo.
Reply #3
05-25-11 07:02 PM
kukuruku
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kukuruku has no influence.barely matters.is working their way up.might someday be someone...is on the verge of being accepted.is a rising star!has a powerful will.is a force to reckon with.has great potential!has an aura about them.is leading the good life!is awe-inspiring!
Oh sige.. Search mode.. wala kasi nagcocoment dati..
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Vice Ganda, sa computer shop.

Vice : kuya, pa extend

CS: Ng time?

Vice: hindi. Yung computer paextend ung cord para maiuwi ko ito. At dun ako sa bahay maglaro! O kaya gawin kong laptop pag pasok ko sa skul bitbit ko ito. Pa out na nga lang!

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Pedro: Pre, nanaginip ako kanina.

Juan: Ano?

Pedro: Naglalaro tayo ng basketball tapos natumba ako, tapos pagsalo mo sakin, nagkalapit ung mga labi natin, tapos..

Juan: Stop!

Pedro: Bakit?

Juan: Kinikilig ako..

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Pedro: Naloko ko yung tindera kanina…wahahaha
Juan: Paano mo naman naloko yung tindera?
Pedro: Nagpaload ako..eh wala naman akong cellphone…hahaha
Reply #4
05-25-11 08:41 PM
kampanerangpusa
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haha ! kulet ni vice xD
Reply #5
05-26-11 10:03 AM
jenicca
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hehe kakatawa mga jokes mo otor dami ko

Reply #6
05-26-11 05:08 PM
john_paul
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haha ayos ah post ka ng more otor
Reply #7
05-26-11 07:25 PM
kukuruku
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Sabi ni
Baby James
- Ang Lolo ko Ninoy
- Ang Tito ko Noynoy
- Ang Kuya ko Abnoy
- Ang Bumabasa nito Unggoy!

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 PEDRO: Pare badtrip na-stuck kami sa Elevator 2hours na nasira!

JUAN: Mas badtrip pare, biruin mo 4 hours akong nakatayo, nasira ung Escalator!

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Mommy1: Ano ang pinapainum mo sa baby mo?

Mommy2: “promil” para sa matatag na pangarap Mommy3: “bonakid” para batang may laban! Eh ikaw? Mommy1: “emperador” para sa totoong tagumpay!

Hahahahaha! adik si MOMMY1!

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pa-hit naman dyan..
Reply #8
05-26-11 10:44 PM
kampanerangpusa
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  ayan naHit na kita    


 

 
Reply #9
05-26-11 10:56 PM
cutedevilz
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nice 1 dahil napatawa mu aku otor itong sayo
Reply #10
05-26-11 10:58 PM
kukuruku
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godbless sa inyu lahat.. May dinagdag ako pala sa taas kanina.
Reply #11
06-03-11 11:28 AM
stormbreaker
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pamarka muna maya na ko post
Reply #12
06-03-11 07:27 PM
jenicca
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hehe natawa ulet ako kay mommy emperador..

Reply #13
06-03-11 09:04 PM
emmanuauel03
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nautas ako kaktawa ahh..hahah more more pa po
 
Reply #14
06-03-11 09:17 PM
kukuruku
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kukuruku has no influence.barely matters.is working their way up.might someday be someone...is on the verge of being accepted.is a rising star!has a powerful will.is a force to reckon with.has great potential!has an aura about them.is leading the good life!is awe-inspiring!
Sa isang classroom...
TITSER: Class, what is ETHICS?

PETER: Etiks are smaller than ducks.

TITSER: Okay, that duck will lay an egg in your card...

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Boy: Will you be my wedding?

Girl: HAHAHAHAHHAAH!

Boy: What's laughing?

Girl: Wrong gramming.. XD

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Teacher: Okay class our lesson for today is science. What is science?

Pedro: Ako ma'am! Ako ma'am!

Teacher: Okay Pedro, what is science?

Pedro: Science is our lesson for today, ma'am!

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May Bata,kumakanta habang namimitas ng mangga

"Mahal kita Mahal kita Hindi ito BoLa"

"Narinig Ng Kapre"

"Itlog Koyan Itlog koyan hindi Ito Bunga"
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Things you don't want to hear during your own surgery:
 1. San 'yong gunting na bago? Ba't may kalawang 'to?
 2. 10ml?! May nakasurv...ive na ba dyan? Sabi ko 5ml lang!
 3. Doc, ubos na po pala 'yong anesthesia.
 4. Kanina pa bukas 'yong tiyan, asan 'yong pantahi?
 5. Sunog! Sunog! Labas lahat!

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MORE TO COME, HIT MUNA..
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